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How We View Keys

Keys! How many times have we misplaced our keys? When we lose track of them we feel a sense of dread. Thoughts flood our mind such as ‘how will we get back into our home without our keys?’ or ‘will someone else find our keys and gain access to our home?’ ‘How will we drive our car without keys?’ ‘How will we open our mail box?’ The situations vary, but they all remind us of how important keys are as it is through them that we have authority and access. Passwords can also be viewed as keys as through them we have authority and can gain access to our email, a bank account, computer program – you name it! These days we have so many passwords to keep track of. Imagine if these ‘keys’ were on a key ring. How big would that key ring have to be?

Keys for Security

In one of my many stops along my career journey, I worked in Corrections; both in an institution and in the community. In order to work as a Corrections Officer I needed the educational requirements and that included completing specific corrections training before assuming the role of a Corrections Officer.

Once this pre-requisite was filled I had the authority to being my work in a very old jail. I was responsible for doing my part to keep the community, myself and fellow staff as well as the inmate population safe and secure.

At the beginning of each shift I would check in at the control centre to pick up my keys for the unit where I would spend my shift. I would also pick up the portable radio that would serve as a lifeline during the shift. I needed to be reachable and connected to the control room and my fellow staff at all times.

I want to focus on the keys we were given. They seemed huge – approximately five inches in length and made of solid brass. They were Folger Adams keys. Their weight a constant reminder of their important role in safety and security for all. I would attach the assigned keys onto my belt before heading out to the unit where I would relieve the staff from the previous shift. To see one’s replacement arrive meant you had made it through another shift and could be free of custodial responsibility for the next how ever many hours you had away from the jail.

As the oncoming staff I was eager to hear the update from my predecessor to inform me of the pulse or mood of the unit; this news would either lessen or heighten my anxiety, trepidation and awareness. Working in a jail I knew the importance of having my ‘radar’ on and being highly aware of what was going on.

I learned a lot during those years and came out of the work experience appreciative of the freedoms I have. I do not take them for granted. I learned how important it is to be part of a support team and to have allies within that team; allies who you can depend on to always ‘have my back’ when a situation arises. I learned that our equipment needs to be in good working order. The radio needed to be on the right channel and the battery fully charged. I learned the importance of knowing which key opened which door and how important it was to keep the key attached to my person, ready to access at all times. I was responsible for that key and fully aware of its power and with it – my authority.

Keys for Caregiving

How does my work within a correctional facility relate to caregiving? What are the keys we need to have available when caregiving?

Do You Call Yourself a Caregiver?

Do you find yourself stepping in to help your parents as a dutiful son or daughter, or your spouse or neighbour, because that’s what a loving spouse or good neighbour does? Have you considered that what you’re doing for them means you’re a caregiver? Perhaps you don’t call yourself ‘caregiver’ because there hasn’t been any formal training or introduction to your role. If you stop and look at all you’re doing, you may realize you are, in fact, a caregiver. You’re in this role – and by calling yourself a caregiver you are in possession of a powerful key that can unlock many caregiving resources, helping fortify and equip you for your caregiving experience. Learning what resources are available may make a huge difference – both to you and your care recipient. Check out this video called Do You Call Yourself “Caregiver”? from the Caregiver Stress Video Series.

In Island Treasures podcast episode “And Then I Danced“ Toni Gitles considered herself as a daughter just doing what any loving daughter would do. She didn’t consider herself as a caregiver and didn’t investigate resources for caregivers until she started calling herself a caregiver.

“As far as the word ‘caregiver’ – I didn’t even identify… to identify yourself gives you access”

Toni Gitles

By calling yourself ‘caregiver’ you are claiming the keys that are necessary to gain access to resources and to equip you for each “shift”. When working in the jail, I would first stop in at the control centre to pick up my equipment for my shift. Clipping the keys to my belt and selecting a portable radio – first ensuring it was on the right channel with its battery fully charged, I would head out to my unit.

A Lifeline

The radio was my lifeline. I was often alone on my unit with the inmates and that lifeline was essential. I needed to know that back-up was just a radio call away. Who can you call for back-up when caregiving? Do you have a friend or ally who is available on speed-dial for you? Do you have a caregiver consultant you could call? Does your loved one had a panic button or fall alert? Do you have respite options? For me, waiting for the next shift to arrive and relieve me of my duty – or to spell me off for a brief break – often helped get me through a difficult shift. Knowing there’s a respite option or that you have a break planned can certainly help during those overwhelming or even times that test your limits when caregiving.

Checking in with staff and knowing who my support team was were both necessary for survival in the jail setting. Learning what had been going on during the previous shift provided the framework needed for my time on the unit. The updates let me know if there had been a lock-down, fights, tensions, illness or death, newcomers to the unit, searches or if one inmate was having a particularly difficult time. This information guided me in my conduct and what to watch for as potential hot spots. With caregiving, checking in with your loved one, their medical team, other caregivers, etc. can also provide valuable information to guide you through caregiving moments. A urinary tract infection (UTI), skin breakdowns or bed sores, changes in medications, or frustrations with new people or caregivers all can inform how best to approach the day.

When I started working in the jail setting, it was a daunting environment and at times it could be volatile and quite unpleasant. I would prepare for each shift by listening to uplifting music as I found that framed my mind positively for what lay ahead. With the education I needed for my work I still needed to perpetually be a student of human behaviour – with my radar on. There were many unpredictable occurrences and when an incident happened it was helpful to draw on the supports of others, when possible. Even confering with other staff or debriefing after an event proved to be most helpful.

Safely Venting

It was when I worked in the jail, that I truly learned the value of venting. I saw how useful a tool it was for inmates to deescalate by providing them with a safe opportunity to let off some steam without getting themselves further into trouble. Venting also worked for the staff to let off pent up anger or frustration. Having a trusted ally helps provide the right circumstances to use this tool effectively and I carry this tool over into my work with caregivers. For more information on safely venting as it relates to caregiving, check out Self-Caregiving Strategies: Venting to Release the Pressure and Caregiver Stress Video Series – Safely Venting.

It is not possible to prepare for everything that may happen. However, it is possible to bring the right equipment along with you. Making sure you know where your keys are at all times so that you can have them ready to access the resources that can improve and supplement your caregiving journey.