There are so many caregivers in the world today. In Canada – 8 million and in the United States there are 53 million caregivers. Awareness to the supports for caregivers is mounting, but for the individual caregiver it may seem it is not enough for their immediate needs. Caregiving is personal – as is the toll it takes on each caregiver. Even though caregiving struggles have similarities – if you’re a caregiver entrenched in your caregiving responsibilities your unique situation with its challenges and struggles may be all you can focus on. That is why the story of the starfish on the beach resonates with me. The story comes from an essay written by Loren Eiseley entitled “The Star Thrower”.
It goes like this:
One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed a young girl picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.
He approached the girl and asked, her what she was doing. She replied, “Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The surf is up, and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them back, they’ll die.” The man chuckled to himself and said, “You do realize there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish? You can’t make any difference.” After listening politely, the girl bent down and picked up another starfish, tossing it into the surf. Then, she smiled back at the man and said, “I made a difference to that one.”
Just like the one starfish being saved by the girl – that amid a sea of many caregivers, that one caregiver who receives personalized supports, may be better equipped to make it through caregiving successfully. Help and resources customized to their needs can help them prevent being burnt out from being left alone in the elements – like the many starfish on the shore were.
Levels of Business
In a corporate world we seem to only hear of the efforts of big businesses and national agencies, where smaller businesses exist that keep performing the day-to-day important work for caregivers; but we seldom hear of their existence, let alone the good that they can do to support caregivers at their immediate time of need. This type of work meets the needs of the one starfish and is of great importance to that one starfish.
I often say that until a professional within a corporation or a politician called upon to lobby for supports, has an encounter with caregiving in their own life, they may not grasp why caregiving supports are vital for caregivers. When it’s personal their passion and purpose are ignited. This is true for any of us in any situation that doesn’t impact us directly… until it does!
Behind the Scenes
Caregivers matter and fortunately, there have been great gains made to highlight the need for more caregiver supports and to raise awareness of the existence and plight of caregivers. According to the Canadian Centre for Caregiving Excellence (CCCE) in an article called Canadian Caregivers are at a Breaking Point, from November 2022, numbers show that caregivers spend more than 5.7 billion hours a year caring for people in their lives. In a dollar value that’s $97.1 billion! Attaching a dollar value hopefully will make folks who aren’t yet caregivers sit up and take notice. (Canadian Caregivers are at a Breaking Point, 2022).
I took note of the CCCE when Katrina Prescott, who was a guest on the Island Treasures podcast in the episode called “A Caregiver’s Transferrable Skills”, mentioned she was co-chair of the Canadian Caregivers Advisory Network (Caregivers CAN) – a network that closely aligns with CCCE’s vision and goals to find practical solutions for caregiving challenges by bringing together knowledgeable caregivers (the experts) as well as researchers. How important this work is! They are adding much needed momentum to the world of caregiving.
Until policies, procedures and legislation are in place to embrace, coordinate, and fully support caregivers’ needs, the gaps to support and care for the caregivers will need to be filled. But, by whom? Most likely by the small, independent businesses and not-for-profits. Many of which are limited in what they can provide, yet often stretched to the limit financially, they often go above and beyond to help fill some of the gaps.
Why I entered the world of caregiving as a consultant
When I worked in long-term care, I started to see caregivers needed more support than they were receiving. Then when I was volunteering for a program for folks living with early-stage dementia and their care partner I saw more deficiencies in resources for caregivers.
One couple in particular stands out for me. Unbeknownst to them they are the reason I started my business to come alongside caregivers and seniors. This couple enjoyed attending the program I mentioned. They loved the activities and the social aspect of the program. That was until they could no longer participate in the group as the wife’s dementia had advanced. This couple had no family, and the friends they had were distancing themselves because of her dementia. They left the group alone, feeling rejected, hopeless, bewildered and quite upset. It was at that moment I knew, with my social work background, I could do something to fill the void that they and others like them were experiencing, and I became a Caregiver Consultant and started Alongside Caregiver Consulting. On a very small scale I began working as an independent supporter of and for caregivers.
Over the past five years I have encountered and supported many caregivers and have seen firsthand the challenges they face along with the toll it takes on their physical, emotional and mental wellbeing. That is why I am ecstatic that campaigns are underway to provide more supports to each and every caregiver, and I’m picturing the shoreline with many starfish tossed back into their welcoming environment. Until that day when new legislation and adequate support is in place, however, I want to remind caregivers of some low cost and no cost options available to help support you and help reduce some of the daily stresses that contribute to burnout.
Low Cost and No Cost Options
Support Groups
One of the best resources for caregivers is a support group. Other caregivers possess wisdom and experience that they bring to the group. Those further along in a caregiving journey share how they’ve navigated the health care system, what resources have or haven’t worked for them, tips, coping strategies, and much-appreciated encouragement. A little coordination and facilitation to form a caregiver support group can provide the resource that will make all the difference to a caregiver who is struggling. By attending a support group in person or online each caregiver knows they are not alone in their caregiving experience.
Podcasts
Another great resource for caregivers is podcasts specific to caregiving. There are many so it’s best to seek out one that you can relate to and that is full of tips, resources and encouragement to help them in your caregiving role. Podcasts are accessible any time, any day, which is a great consideration for caregivers who may be unable to leave their home because of their caregiving responsibilities. Most podcasts are free to listen to. One such podcast is the Island Treasures podcast featuring over 100 episodes – just for caregivers; and if a podcast episode helps just one caregiver, like one starfish on the beach – it is a success! Other listeners can benefit from the content as well; but the episodes are geared towards caregiving. Each month the Island Treasures full episodes highlight a caregiver who shares their caregiving journey to encourage other caregivers. There are also mini episodes designed for when caregivers don’t have a lot of time to spend in one sitting to listen to a whole episode.
We are Making Progress
Thankfully progress is being made to raise awareness of the existence of caregiving and the needs and presence of caregivers in our neighbourhoods. Campaigns, advocacy, and consultations are underway proposing more strategies and financial support from our governments for unpaid caregivers. In the meantime, caregivers need immediate services, assistance, compassion and support. If you see a caregiver who needs some life-saving intervention, think of the starfish on the beach, and give them some support and compassion and help them know they are not alone.
